Single Fathers: The Pain and The Joy

Parenthood is a difficult job. Raising children, teaching them manners and social rules alongside safeguarding them from all sorts of harm requires massive dedication. If you happen to be a single parent, and that too a single father, you may find yourself overwhelmed by the various pressures that are part and parcel of childrearing.

Single fathers are not necessarily those who have sole custody of their children but those who live separate from their children’s mother. Fathers once upon time were perceived as simply disciplinarian models that had little or no emotional support to offer their children. However, there are now a significant number of single fathers raising children. Thankfully now there has been a significant paradigm shift and fathers in general are a lot more hands on about being a part of their children’s life and activities.

But where single fathers are involved, cases need to be handled slightly differently and with extra care. Chances are the children have at some point or the other seen their parents together or have prior to being with their single father have spent considerable time with their mother. In such situations, one of the major pains in a single dad’s life is making his place and establishing an independent relationship with their kids but at the same time, this is also one of the most joyous things as well.

It is definitely difficult to get a strong understanding started, that too with children who are adjusting to being one on one with their dad but at the same time this phase of the father-child relationship is what many fathers consider to be the ‘golden period’ and comes with its own rewards. Here are some of the ways fathers can try and get through the difficult times while retaining the joy of connecting with their offspring. Single father parenting is an art that fathers must master. 

Plan everyday activities with your kids. It may not be the easiest thing in the world to simply sit down with your children and discussing how things are, what went wrong and how they are going to be. At these points children are already stressed and emotionally unstable. In order to avoid awkward and hurtful conversations right off the bat, instead plan some light and fun activities that you all can engage in together. While carrying these things out, it may even be as simple as going to get groceries together, try having normal conversations with them and then slowly touching on sensitive topics. This gives you great bonding time and also gives the kids things to look forward to, an activity that involves their dad where they can be a help too.

Show confidence and be as strong as ever. If you are confused then your children are going to be much worse off as children are very perceptive to emotions and feelings. In order to be the strong role model parent you need to show confidence. Telling your kids that everything is fine and that you are going to take care of things is important and will help them relax. A father is a protector figure in a child’s life and the more they feel that way about you, the more they will open up to you. Having your child approach you with problems is a joy in itself and shows that they trust you. Many fathers have recalled that their children’s faith in them has kept them going and been one of the joy of their entire parenting careers.

 

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