Do You Fight in Front of Your Kids?

The human civilization was born in conflict, nurtured by war, and then made dumb by self-obsession. Nevertheless, our violent history of aggression doesn’t give you the right to pick up a fight with our spouse and that too in front of your children.

The next time you fight with your spouse scan your surroundings for the presence of children. Good parenting skills demand that innocent souls shouldn’t be exposed to violence at home.

Some reasons not to fight with your better half are discussed below:

Order through Fear

Have you ever seen the face of a child when he/she hears adults yelling at each other? Their faces turn as white as the deep winter snow.

Similar to adults, children also get stressed out by constant yelling and arguing among their parents. The effect of the violent episode doesn’t diminish immediately but lingers on in the minds of children for some time to come.

It is impossible to exercise order in the house through fear (intentional or unintentional). What arguing adults really teach their kids is that it’s okay to yell at each other when there are disagreements between two grown-ups. After all it is how adults handle their problems, right?

Stuffed with Anger

Fighting in front of kids is bad because it strikes fear in the hearts and the minds of children but this is not the only problem associated with such happenings.

Kids usually seek adult council when they want to hear comforting words or good advice. At such times when parents are busy shouting at each other, kids are suddenly left with no other choice but to stuff their fears inside. Bottled up feelings have the potential to explode at any time and pave the way for disobedience against parents.

Finding a Way around the Problem

If you’re interested in doing some research on the topic as how disrespectful disagreements between parents can affect the well-being of children, you would find many studies that would give you a good reality check.

One way of going about the problem is to resolve the issues with your partner in front of the kids after you have had an unhealthy competition of verbal jousting.

It would also be a good idea to work on controlling your impulsive behavior (if you have any) in order to prevent the peace treaty from disintegrating.

Ego is the enemy of reason. Let go of your “adult” egos and learn how to apologize to your spouse if you are wrong. Learn to forgive and forget in order to teach your kids the value of finding peaceful resolution to a problem.

Diplomacy Is for All Seasons

You are expected to show more civility and maturity in situations that lead towards conflict. Therefore, when one of the parent’s feel that a conflict is about to begin, he/she should shy away from it and leave the discussion for a later time.

There is nothing wrong about exercising diplomacy to teach your children valuable life lessons. The truth is that all couples have arguments. We should take care to teach our kids how to handle tense situation with wisdom and good reasoning.

Spare your children from witnessing adult ferocity by not fighting in front of them. The decision to make or break them is in your hands only.

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