10 Signs You're Too Strict with Your Teens

Almost all the parents face discipline dilemmas and related issues, but the way they deal with these issues is what makes them either good parents or bad ones. The relationship between a parent and kid should be more informal than formal, but this is only possible if you find the right balance between being too strict and too lenient. We have developed a checklist mentioning the behavior traits of strict parents and highlighted their parenting mistakes. If you relate to any or most of them, then it’s time to change your parenting strategy.

Creating Rules is Your Hobby

Creating rules develop traits like self-discipline among kids, but an excess of anything is bad. According to Nancy Darling, a psychology professor and PhD, setting too many rules is a clear indication of the fact that you are too strict. He is of the view that parents should set limited rules which they can easily follow through as creating rules is an easy part, but reinforcing them is not.

You Do Not Feel Hesitant Threatening Your Kids

If you threaten kids to get things done, then you are not only a strict parent, but also a bad person. Threatening behavior can have a negative impact on the psychological health and mental growth of kids.

You Do Not Give Personal Space to Kids

If you are among those parents who consider it their right to interfere in everything their kids do, then you are definitely a strict parent. Giving advice to kids is one thing and imposing your decisions on them is something else. Darling believes that parents should not create rules related to personal things like which music course the kid should take, what type of dress the kid should wear, which hairstyle should the kid choose, etc.

You Never Think Before Speaking

Darling believes that it’s not just the body language, but also the content that matters. So parents should be careful while talking with kids as the latter record and remember everything they hear from their parents.

Your Kids Do Not Talk to You Too Often

Kids prefer talking with people they feel comfortable with and if they are not sharing their daily routine or their personal matters with you, then chances are there is something wrong at your end. You may win the battle by being strict with them, but you will definitely lose the relationship.

Your Role is that of a Reminder, a Cop or a Monitor

If you find yourself reminding kids about every little thing, monitoring their activities or playing the bad cop all the time while neglecting all other things, then you need to change your parenting style as there is more to being a parent than doing the aforementioned activities.

You Have a Bossy Attitude

If you only order things and never help kids in completing the tasks assigned to them, then you are without a doubt a strict parent. Good parenting is not just about giving orders or setting rules, but is more about helping kids in everything they do.

Your Kids Avoid Inviting Their Friends Over

Kids love inviting their friends home as long as they are sure that they will be well served. If your kids do not invite their friends over out of fear that you may humiliate them in front of their friends or they may make fun of them for unreasonable rules you have set, then you need to show flexibility in your behavior.

Your Love is Not Unconditional

It is commonly believed that parents love their kids unconditionally, but sometimes your words tell the opposite. If you frequently say things like I love you but I want you to pass this exam or I love you but I won’t tolerate bad behavior, then kids will automatically feel that they do not deserve your love unless they follow certain rules.

You Never Express Your Feelings

When was the last time you hugged your kids, gave them a kiss, or even patted their shoulder to express love, appreciation, or encouragement? A common trait of strict parents is that they are as cold as ice. It is never wise to be anything like them.

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